TODAY ON POWER RANGERS David Yost DOESN'T steal the spotlight when a Michigan School bans MMPR merchandise. But, there's more trouble when NO PROFILES are in Max's newsletter. But, good fortune calls as Mark tells more about the "Nobody's Purfict" guide. Will the Rangers play fun and games when a new joke is told? Or, will they get serious in time for the quiz show? Find out next on the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers! WHAT DO WE HAVE TODAY? I. Today On Power Rangers II. What Do We Have Today? III. The Online Welcome Mat IV. Ask Max V. Nobody's Purfict Guide VI. You Can Quote Me On That VII. Trivia Pursuit VIII. Scoreboard IX. Fun and Games X. Did you know...? XI. The Swimming Poll XII. Mark's Amazing Joke Column XIII. The Grand Prize XIV. Quiz Show/Clue XV. Standing In The Spotlight: PREEMPTED XVI. HELP!!! XVII. Heather's meeting with A.J. XVIII. Michigan School Bans MMPR Merchandise XVIV. That's All Folks THE ONLINE WELCOME MAT Here's some bad news...besides him, my welcome mat is all clean and nice and neat. Not dusty or messy from new footprints. The more the merrier...so, if you know someone who would like to be a guest, point them in the direction of my welcome mat! I'll be waiting! There is some good news: We are losing a member--kelleyo@csra.net. She sent me this message: PLEASE TAKE ME OFF YOUR MAILING LIST AND GET A LIFE. Isn't that nice? I spend the majority of my day working on this and people tell me to get a life. Am I missing something here? ASK MAX Q Why was the newsletter a day late? --Mm__ A Well, Max (No one asked this but you) my bill used to be WAY too high (in the $270-320 range) and one day my mom decided to cancel my account. I begged her to let me stay and told her about the newsletters. The AOL guy on the phone told her about this thing where a member is capped. If their bill goes over a certain amount, they wouldn't be able to get on until their new account started. My cap is on $80. If I go over that, I can't get back on until 1) my new account begins 2) my mom orders more time. I finally got my mom to order time -- so I could send out the newsletter, but by the time she called, the place was closed. I didn't get more time until Tuesday. The first thing I did was send out the newsletter. No one seemed to care that it was late. I was planning on sending out a new issue on Tuesday and a back issue on Thursday-- starting next week. Now you know what to expect. ;-) Q Is Walter Jones gay? --br550@freenet.toronto.on.ca A No!!! He was the only Ranger to suckface on "An Oyster Stew". If he were gay, he would never have been given that part. Or, for further more, he wouldn't have seemed to enjoy it as much. A lot of Rangers are said to be gay because they're so nice and entergetic...or their characters are. That's why they're usually chosen to be "gay". I was rumored to be "gay" once because I was into acting more than sports. The problem was the teachers had a meeting about me and the counselor asked me about it. That hurt really bad. Even though some guys chose to be "unstraight" and there's nothing wrong with that--I didn't like being accused. How would you like if all your teachers thought of you as a homo? Well, luckily mlhttu (a girl in my drama class) and friends helped me through it but it was hell [sorry]. I hope that Walter and all the other Rangers don't have to face what I went through. And, how many gays have the hots for Amy Jo? ;-) NOBODY'S PURFICT GUIDE The guide is doing well but it's REALLY weak. I need MORE! If you can, I want to name an episode a day and everyone who can should watch that episode and name all the mistakes they can. I watched carefully on "The Ninja Encounter Part I" and noticed four mistakes. Guys, this is IMPORTANT. One or two episodes a day is all I'm asking... Today's episode is "High Five" and/or "Teamwork". Thanks! YOU CAN QUOTE ME ON THAT Last week's first quote was "What a fruitcake." It was said by Zack/Black Ranger on "No Clowning Around" when the Pineoctopus first appeared and started acting really stupid. I thought you guys would get this since "NCA" was on video AND on the CD Rom game. Sbolton@nbnet.nb.ca got it right. The second quote was "No, it's yours." It was Adam in "When Is A Ranger Not A Ranger?" Billy went to his lab without a brain (You all know what I mean) and said, "Amazing [or something]. Is it yours?" And, Adam answers "No.....it's yours." Mesia13 got this right first, and then c.mikoluff@genie.geis.com. Today's quotes are: QUOTE 1- "What am I doing here?" QUOTE 2- "Calm dooowwnn!" TRIVIA PURSUIT Last week's question was "Which Ranger used two different languages?" It was Kimberly in "Different Drum". She used both sign language, English, and Spanish. Just kidding.... KibaRanger got this right first, then sbolton@nbnet.nb.ca, Mesia13, and then c.mikoluff Today's trivia question was "Which Ranger was naked and on which episode?" SCOREBOARD c.mikoluff@genie.geis.com: 3 points KibaRanger: 2 points Mesia13: 4 points sbolton@nbnet.nb.ca: 3 points Last time, c.mikoluff@genie.geis.com and KibaRanger got first place. And, sbolton@nbnet.nb.ca and Hoshiko466 tied for second, while the Hendons got third place. FUN AND GAMES Last week's game was "Unscamble these names of monsters:" IOOUPENCPST--PINEOCTOPUS AYGLRN NOMEG--GNARLY GNOME NONACTPNO--CANNONTOP DMAEMA OWE--MADAME WOE VLERSI RSOHN--SILVER HORNS NIGK XHPNIS--KING SPHINX ROERTR DTAO--TERROR TOAD RAMSIAU ANF NAM--SAMURAI FAN MAN DGPYU IGP--PUDGY PIG LERNAIKSLE--SKELLERINA IUAGASLNA--SALIGUANA AOLBAKO--BOOKALA TPSI OEWFRL--SPIT FLOWER KCHLEHSLOS--SHELLSHOCK Herndons got this right first (2 points), and then Mesia13 (1 point) and c.mikoluff (1) Today's game is called "Hide and Go Peak". P O W E R R A N G E R Y E R Y O L B C K N S P T O R S E S T G U M I K J I G I R O A P L J O A N I L C A H O N E O S R L F I T Z Z L A S P L K C A L B O R O B B R Y Z O R D O N G U E W P A T T S T S N O A R T E P N E A N O K B R T G M R G R R E R E F W M D N B S A U R U S G R E D V G M J E U L B S E T A R A K T H G Y G E W A T U L W H I T E G F D S C R O V D R O Z O N I D E T U Y F G I N I R T I G E R R Y U I N I B B T U R T B R S R T I X B N N E D D I E F K A R A T E V A D D F R I S B E E S R O B C S N D E CLUES: TIGER (from Sabre-Tooth Tiger) POWER RANGER RITA REPULSA ZORDON SAURUS (from Tyrannosaurus) KIM (from Kimberly) GO (from Go Go Power Rangers!") JASON TRINI TOMMY ZACK BILLY DINOZORD KARATE RED WHITE GREEN YELL OW BLACK PINK MORPHIN NOTE: You guys SHOULD do this on your own piece of paper. It's impossible to make an even grid on a word prosessor. DID YOU KNOW....? Step By Step is a show for MMPR fans? Walter was on an episode called "Head of the Class" where he played Joe. I have been waiting for THIS episode to come for a long time and I KNEW it would come when I checked. Next Friday (not tomorrow--the NEXT Friday) there will be an episode called "Can't Buy Me Love " and Becky Herbst gets the lead as Shelley. Becky is the girl that played Shawna on "Forever Friends". Watch it, tape it, enjoy it! ;-) Step By Step is on TGIF on Friday nights... NOTE: I also have heard that Laurie Fortier is her name. I'm confused so watch for me. THE SWIMMING POLL Here is an update on the polls... POLL 1- FAVE RANGER [From greatest # of points to lowest # of points.] Who is your favorite Ranger? 1. PINK RANGER - 12 points 2. BLUE RANGER and WHITE RANGER- 6 points 3. RED RANGER- 5 points 4. GREEN RANGER- 4 points 6. YELLOW RANGER and BLACK RANGER- 2 points FAVE NON-RANGERS: Who is your favorite non-Ranger? 1. BULK & SKULL-15 points 2. JASON/TRINI/ZACK: 3 points 3. ZORDON- 2 points 4. ALPHA 5, DRAGONZORD, ERNIE, FINSTER, FROG ZORD, GOLDAR, LORD ZEDD, RICHIE/CURTIS, RITA, SABA, WHITE TIGERZORD, SABER-TOOTHED TIGER ZORD and TOR- 1 point POLL 2: WEIRDEST MERCHANDISE With Saban Entertainment getting all this cash, they have been making a lot of weird products? What do you think is the weirdest? Trini and Kimberly Dolls, The Gummy Rangers, Mac n Cheese, ALL OF IT, the Swiss Army Pencil Box, Parachuting Ranger, The Punching Bags, The McDonald zords, the MMPR fruit snacks, Mr. Caplan POG., Micro-Morphin Mini Playsets, Zordon Spin Fighter, Ranger Fruit Drinks and Granola Bars, Popcorn, 3' tall Ranger figures, MMPR oatmeal w/marshmallow lightning bolts, Rita Repulsa Nighlight, bathroom sets, Power Ranger nightlight, Red Ranger's motorcycle bedside lamp, MMPR talking bank, Power Ranger rings, paint set, 7-UP can, MMPR chicklets, Red Ranger Electric Toothbrush and..." "I think that the funniest MMPR merchandise, I saw in an airport gift shop. The Pink ranger makeup and lip gloss kit. The top of this little compact looks like kim's helmet and there's a mirror inside and a bunch of different flavors of lip gloss. I would have bought it, but I didn't have time. But doesn't that just crack you up? A kimberly makeup kit! I'm thinking, what is next, a blue ranger laptop? Or maybe a red ranger pachinko game?" -- Mousy99 Know what? I think the weirdest merchandise is the coolest. If anyone can get me some of this stuff, tell me!!! POLL 3- NOBODY'S PURFICT! If you're a new member, you've missed a lot of dumb mistakes. Because of old footage, MMPR goofs a lot on the script and stuff. Anything you noticed? In Wild West Rangers, when Kim gets the Power Coins from Zordon, and takes them back to the town, when she says "It's Morphin Time" all the "grandparents" look at her like she's nuts right before they all morph. All except Aisha, who immediately glares into the camera, assumes the "morphin stance" and swings her hand behind her back. Just like usual. All the boy "rangers" just look confused. --Aharhel I have just received A LOT of Nobody's Purfict. I'm going to run out if I use them all in one issue. I've written a guide called "Nobody's Purfict". It will be out soon so people can watch their fave episodes and look for mistakes. My goal is to get a mistake for every episode. So, watch those tapes and tell me what you find out. ;-) POLL 4-FAVE MONSTER (In ABC Order) Which monster do you love? [Aw--Gnarly Gnome is losing!!!] 1. EVIL GREEN RANGER- 5 points 2. EVIL ALPHA, GNARLY GNOME, and SCORPINA- 2 points 3. BEAMCASTER, CHUNKY CHICKEN, EVIL BILLY, FANG, IVAN OOZE, MADAME WOE, MONDO THE MAGICIAN, MORDANT, NIMROD, OCTOPHANTOM, PUDGY PIG, PURSEHEAD, ROBOGOAT, SCORPINA, SERPENTERA, SNOWMAN. POLL 5-L.O.L. What do you think is the funniest MMPR episode? 1. THE WEDDING PART I/II- 5 points 2. WILD WEST RANGERS- 4 points 3. BEST MAN FOR THE JOB and ROCKY JUST WANTS TO HAVE FUN- 3 points 4. SWITCHING PLACES- 2 points 5. BLUE RANGER GONE BAD, DIFFERENT DRUM, FOUL PLAY IN THE SKY, MIGHTY MORPHIN MUTANTS, POWER RANGER PUNKS, RETURN OF THE GREEN RANGER, SOMETHING FISHY, STORYBOOK RANGERS- 1 point POLL 6-MUSIC BOX What is your fave song from Ron's album? FAVE MIGHTY RAW SONG: 1. WE NEED A HERO- 9 points 2. FIGHT- 7 points 3. ALL OF THEM!- 3 points 4. 5-4-1 and GO GO POWER RANGERS- 2 points 5. GO GREEN RANGER GO and I WILL WIN- 1 point FAVE SOUNDTRACK SONG (In Order of Track): What is your fave song from the MMPRTM soundtrack: 1. KUNG FU' DANCIN'- 6 points 2. AYEYAIYAI (Alpha's Song) and CROSS MY LINE- 5 points 2. ARE YOU READY?, and DREAMS- 4 points 3. GO GO POWER RANGERS and SENSURROUND- 3 points 4. HIGHER GROUND and TROUBLE- 2 points 5. THE POWER, ALL OF THEM!- 1 point POLL 7-THE EMPEROR'S NEW CLOTHES If you could have any MMPR costume--monster or Ranger--from the show or movie, which would it be? 1. BLACK NINJETTI and BLUE NINJETTI- 3 votes 2. RED NINJETTI, WHITE NINJETTI- 2 votes 3. BLUE RANGER, GNARLY GNOME, GOLDAR (With wings), FINSTER, KIMBERLY'S OUTFIT [From "Wild West Rangers"] RED POWER SUIT, RED/GREEN HELMET [From "The Wanna-Be Ranger"] SCORPINA, SKULL'S PINK GOWN [From "The Song of Guitardo"], TOMMY'S PIRATE OUTFIT [From "Zedd's Monster Mash"] and TOMMY'S SUIT [From "An Oyster Stew"] - 1 point NEW POLL: AIYIYIYI! Hee hee....I just wanted to say what you guys would answer. "When Is A Ranger Not A Ranger?" got a point. Yep, that should have been Rated R. Hee hee--I don't think ANY episodes are very scary (Except for one fanfiction that I'm not going to mention) QUIZ SHOW The game show will be a mixture of trivia, quotes, and fun and games (Simple ones...hee hee). I *think* it will be on September 3rd. The contestants will be: XSENTAIX, RedRng, Hoshiko466, KibaRanger, Herndons, Patri56297, and Mesia13. New winners will be in the SECOND game show. Can any of you help me out? Even if you don't have AOL! BTW, Ellen--what are we going to do? You're a "winner" but you don't have AOL. How are you going to come to the chat room??? You could be on the quiz show crew. INTERNET PEOPLE: You can be on the quiz show crew. All you have to do is give me ideas. MARK'S AMAZING JOKE COLUMN How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? KIMBERLY- Like, enough to buy a new outfit. JASON- It depends on how buff he is. If I were a woodchuck, there would be no unchucked wood in the world. In fact, I thi-- ROCKY- Isn't that work? Woodchucks just want to have fun. BILLY- A comprehensive aggregate of timberland. ADAM- I'm a frog. ZACK- I don't know-but anything a woodchuck can do I can do better. TRINI- I can chuck a lot of wood. I'll do it for you for ten times more than you're offering. ZACK- Hey, I asked first. ADAM- I'm a frog. AISHA- How much wood? Uhm....pass. BULK- Chucking wood is for dorks! SKULL- Yeah--for dorks! BULK- Shut up!!! ADAM- I'm a frog. RITA- A woodchuck could chuck as much as he could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood....AHHHH!!! Tonguetwisters hurt my head! I've got a....migraine. LORD ZEDD- Don't chuck wood! I need it for a table I'm going to make when I gain control of Earth. SQUATT/BABOO/GOLDAR: Control of Earth? Give it up, Zedd! LORD ZEDD- Shut up! SKULL- Yeah, shut up! BULK- Shut up! ADAM- I'm a frog. ALL- SHUT UP!!!!! TOMMY- Well, I don't know. But, I can break about eight or nine blocks with my head. (He demonstartes and breaks his neck.) Hee hee...where's Dave? He should be here by now! THE GRAND PRIZE Well, I got a really cool theme song today--right before the newsletter was finished. It's from a member who would like to remain anonymous. YOU GOTTA READ (to the tune of "You Gotta Be" by Des'Ree) Listen as your day unfolds Challenge what the future holds What will happen...and on what date? What happens on season three? What kinda changes will there be? I -- can't -- wait! Yeah, yeah, yeah... So you gotta read... You gotta read fast You gotta read hard And, get the inside scoop. Gotta read much. And, then we'll know what's... going on in Ranger land. You gotta read more... ...end the summer bore Keep your eyes open... 'Cause all I know, and I know... Max will save the day. If I ever wonder how And, want to know the answer now I know exactly where to look... Max's book. This mouse knows everything... just like he is one of them. This guy will write anything on a whim. He's gotta be... He's gotta be smart He's gotta know all He's gotta have the answers He's gotta be tough He's gotta be rough He's gotta have opinions He's gotta give the scoop Tell us 'bout the troop He's gotta share the facts now... 'Cause all I know, and I know, Max will save the day. If you have questions... he will answer them. Won't leave them behind...without a trace. More goes on than you think... in Ranger land This time you've got the answers...in one place. Oh oh.... So, if you ever want to know Then you know just where to go... E-mail Marx Okman and he'll be ready to help! With exclusive interviews, spotlights, polls: to name a few My...oh my....Ask Max. So you gotta read... You gotta read fast You gotta read hard And, get the inside scoop. Gotta read much. And, then we'll know what's... going on in Ranger land. You gotta read more... ...end the summer bore Keep your eyes open... 'Cause all I know, and I know... Max will save the day. You gotta read fast, You gotta read hard, You gotta read much, and ask away. You gotta read more, end the summer bore. All I know is...Max will save the day. Repeat choruses until fade.... MAX: Hee hee...opinions. Even in a theme song, it had to be brought up! Yes, I am a smart and know it all...hee hee. I like it! ;-) Ha ha.... QUIZ SHOW/CLUE The game show will be a mixture of trivia, quotes, and fun and games (Simple ones... hee hee). It will also have a series of clues to solve the final problem. I *think* it will be on September 3rd. The contestants will be: XSENTAIX, RedRng, Hoshiko466, KibaRanger, Herndons, Patri56297, and Mesia13. New winners will be in the SECOND game show. Can any of you help me out? Even if you don't have AOL! BTW, Ellen--what are we going to do? You're a "winner" but you don't have AOL. How are you going to come to the chat room??? You could be on the quiz show crew. INTERNET PEOPLE: You can be on the quiz show crew. All you have to do is give me ideas. STANDING IN THE SPOTLIGHT: PREEMPTED Due to lack of space (and lack of spotlights), I'll do the spotlight on David next Tuesday. HELP!!! c.mikoluff@genie.geis.com is supposed to get me "Different Drum" (Trading?) Hoshiko says she has "A Pressing Engagement". James is working on the "Entertainment Tonight" interview. There's still one more thing.... Austin had a SMALL part in a movie called "Showdown". It is playing on The Movie Channel on Tuesday the 29th at 5:05 and Cinemax Thursday the 31st at 4:30. Austin plays a ninja who gets killed in a one-minute battle. I'm willing to trade Austin's scene for SOME episodes. HEATHERS MEETING WITH A.J. Heather a.k.a. Ami Ree sent me this: I started my college classes today and in my history class there was this girl wearing shirt shorts and boots. As I glanced at her I thought boy she's got a Kimberly look today. come to find out her name's Amy Johnson.......kowinkidink????? i think so. But I thought it would be cool to tell you. I though of you when the teacher said her name.. Catch ya on the flip side...Ami:) MAX: Get me her autograph!!! Tell her, "To my dearest friend, Mark. Love, Amy Johnson." Hey, it's better than nothing. ;-) MICHIGAN BANS MMPR MERCHANDISE (1/5/95) WARNING: This info. is totally outdated. Read at your own risk: A private preschool in Oak Park, MI, a suburb of Detroit, has banned dolls, T-shirts, lunch boxes, and other Mighty Morphin Power Ranger merchandise, saying show cultivates violent behavior. The Workmen's Circle Early Childhood Center said its ban will take effect Jan. 23. (C) Copyright Critics' Choice and Studio Briefing 1995 THAT'S ALL FOLKS.... David Yost steals the spotlight after reading a funny joke column from Dave. But, when a new fun and game appears on Earth, only Max can save the day. Will he write a review on "The White Album" in order to print a mistake in the Swimming Poll? Find out on the all-new issue coming on Tuesday and get ready for a back issue on Thursday. And, after that, I will b--oops, gotta go: "NINJETTI.................................THE BAOBAB!" Mm___)